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Scream... and Die!/Review

From The Grindhouse Cinema Database

< Scream... and Die!
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Fashion model, Valerie (Andrea Allan) decides to tag along with her troublesome boyfriend/photographer, Terry (Alex Leppard) who's content on driving out to a specific house in the woods that is known to pack major moolah which is hidden in a safe. It's unsure if Terry has picked the right house, but Valerie (Who was supposed to stay in the car) feels the urge enter the house as well and snoop around as well. She eventually finds Terry, but before the two of them decide to take off, in comes the owner of the house who has brought himself a date. Valerie and Terry hide themselves in a closet and give a peep to what's going on. Only the lady-friend is doing all the talking as the male (Hidden from view) just smokes and displays his black gloves (Since this film takes place during the giallo era, you know where this is headed) Sure enough, the man attacks and stabs the woman to death. With the killer out of view, Valerie bolts out of the house leaving Terry behind (Eh, the guy was no good anyway) A slow, wannabe suspenseful chase occurs as Valerie tries to lose the killer who appears to be on her trail. But once daybreak approaches, Valerie is free and hitches a ride back to London.

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Let me tell you this, even though Valerie is beautiful and well-stacked, she sure isn't the smartest girl around town. Val later finds out that the killer knows her identity and knows where she lives but....She doesn't do anything about it! Only when her roommate gets raped and strangled by the killer, THEN she finally decides to pay Scotland Yard a visit! Aren't you a little late from preventing that, honey? But since this happens nearly an hour into the film, we have to shift back to some other business that concerns Valerie's blossoming romance between an artist named Paul (Karl Lanchbury), his strangely dominating Aunt Suzie (Maggie Walker), and a new, but also mysterious neighbor who now lives under Valerie's apartment. All these loose ends will connect in the end, but watch out, it's a very exhaustive process to get through.

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But this is quite expected from director José Ramón Larraz. As with his other popular film, Vampyres, there are good moments that occasionally pop up in between the very long and slow sections of his movies. You just always feel the need to scream at the movie to "Get on with it" before you reach the point of having to switch the movie off and attend to more important things. But to his credit, he finds a way to prevent the male-dominated-viewing crowd from dozing off by letting the actresses in his movies disrobe. Andrea Allen was a European Penthouse Pet (And a nice one at that) so it's pleasing to see this photographic babe recieve some nice visual treatment. In fact, every other female character in this movie bares all---Including the fiftysomething Maggie Walker, who's character pulls out the sexy moves for her incestual relationship (Whoa!!) But the one thing that is bound to pull the viewers in for this movie is the horror aspect which doesn't live up to any expectations. There are tons of giallos out there that are able to get the job done better and are much more entertaining. Go for those instead.

By the way, I sure wonder what movie Tagline #3 is still describing because it sure as hell wasn't this one.

Reviewed by Laydback

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